It appears to me that I have become more and more insular as time has gone on. I don't know what I do any more and I don't know who I do it with. Have I forsaken my friends, or have they forsaken me? For what it's worth, I accept part of the blame, for not being proactive, for not nourishing and sustaining friendships that have withered and I hope not died. Blame is a strong word though, for I do not seek explanation, only a return to simpler times when involvement in activities was assured rather than cautiously asked for.
I am sorry for all the friendships I have let lapse. I started to think that I was an inconvenience to others, and that it wasn't cool to invite myself round to your houses, that you all had busy lives that I didn't want to unbalance. I hope this was a silly, groundless thought.
Next year, things are going to change. I am going to make a pest of myself, and if you do mind then I'm sure you'll let me know, as you are my friends and I would like to think you would tell me straight.
Have a good Hogmanay, and I will be annoying you in the near future.
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